A GOOD Negative!!

For the past week, I have not worried as much about a baby...as much as I have worried about myself. I can finally vent my "GOOD negative"!!!

While doing IVF, they make you take a ton of tests...including all the bad stuff you "could have". One test in particular is important for IVF because you could pass it on to your child. This test is for Adult Leukemia...CANCER!

I took this test 3 times! I was told the 3rd time that they STILL couldn't get a negative result and needed me to take an additional DNA test that was more sensitive. I have never been more scared in my entire life! I actually broke down...broke down completely! I called my Mom and she and her friend Kate drove from Vacaville on a moment's notice to come to my house, pray with me, calm me down and basically LIFT me up! Also, Jim and his parents were by my side to just love me and cry with me.

I know this all seems trite with the test being negative now...but for the last week...I was faced with my own life ending (as dramatic as that sounds...that's how I felt). I just wanted to be here and healthy...the fertility issue seemed small in comparison.

Sooooooooooooooooooooo....

I'm okay...I'm okay...I'm okay!!!! God is Good...God is Good...God is Good!

On a side note...my follicles look great, I feel pretty good and I'm ready for egg harvesting on Thursday :-))))))) Yayyyyyy

Sometimes you look around and see things more clear...what's important...what's pure and simple...what's ultimately important in your life!! ...And sometimes, it's just good!

Lookin' Good!

I had my 5th Ultrasound this morning...at the crack of dawn (7AM, and that's crack of dawn for me). Jim came with me to see the progress.

They took my blood, for the hundredth time, and the Dr. did his ultrasound.

My ovaries look fantastic! Dr. Vu says that each one of my ovaries has over 15 good follicles. This means he will be able to harvest over 25 eggs for fertilization. Some women don't have many follicles and the Dr. can't harvest many, so they are left with a minimal amount of frozen embryos if the 1st round of IVF doesn't work. I...am all good though! :-)

He said everything looks good and we are on track for egg retrieval and semen donation....THIS COMING THURSDAY!!!!! Whooooaaaahhhhhh!!!!!! Crazy how fast this is going.

I have another ultrasound on Monday and he said be prepared to feel like you are about 3 months pregnant...I'm going to be swelling and uncomfortable this week.

I say....BRING IT ON...I'm doing this for my baby!!!

(picture is not of me...just an example of what a hyper-stimulated (one) ovary with multiple follicles looks like. Now imagine, you are only supposed to create on of this little sacs each month...and my ovaries are carrying 15+ on each....OUCH).

Ultrasound went great

I had my fourth ultrasound for our IVF session and my follicles (the little sacks holding my eggs) look GREAT! I have over 15 on the right ovary and over 20 on the left. The Dr. says they all look good and are progressing well.

He said I may be feeling good now...but give it a week and I will be cursing his name...oh good!

I was a little tired today and am starting to feel a little "tight" in the belly area...my insides are going to go for a little ride...buckle up!

Thank you to all of you who have called and emailed asking how I'm doing!!! Your simple "how are you doing" means the world to me!!! I'm truly seeing who my "rocks" are.

A Video of what we do every day...AM and PM

Oh well, who cares if the camera adds 10 lbs....this is what we do. It doesn't look bad, but we've perfected it now :-)

Feeling OK today

Yesterday was rough. I won't go into details, but it was just a rough day for me.

Yet, thanks to two Amazing women who sat with me for over two hours to pray for me and hold me up...and a surprise stop from my in-laws who dropped off some gifts for my garden...and a Husband who amazes me every day with his love, kindness and ability to make me feel good.......I'm feeling soooo much better today.

I know this is a journey and I thank God every day for putting amazing people in my life to help me (us) along the way. My cup runneth over!


THANKS: Mom, Kate, Big Jim, Helen and my Jimmy

Just venting

I actually said yesterday to my cousin's wife (who is over 8 months pregnant)
"I don't feel any weird hormonal swings or have any issues right now".

Looks like I forgot to knock on wood!

Last night's shot(s) were a little rough and this morning I woke up with a bit of the blues (and a bruise) and a HUGE desire for Fudruckers! Yes, Fudruckers! Guess where we are having dinner tonight...possibly lunch.

So, it looks like the hormone shots are doing their job...giving me extra hormones. Only three more days of the four shots a day, and then we are back to only two shots...YAYYY!!!

This is what happens when a shot goes wrong...

Starting SHOTS (caps for drama-sake)

I actually took a video of the "first shots" of our IVF....but I refuse to post it. I know the camera adds ten pounds, but really...REALLY!!! I know you are not supposed to lose weight before you get pregnant, but mama needs to tone up a bit (I think I actually saw a double chin...scary). I guess we'll just keep that video for our own amusement :-)

Okay, so most of that was not about fertility, but as I said...we started shots today.

For the next two days:
1 Lupron shot in the AM
1 Lupron shot in the PM

Starting Saturday (4 shots a day):
1 Lupron shot in the AM
1 Gonal F in the AM
1 Lupron shot in the PM
1 Menopur in the PM