Pray for Today

Well, today is the blood test that will tell us if the IVF worked and if we are pregnant.

The amount of love and support we have received during the past month has been amazing...absolutely amazing!

Please understand that if this test is negative...I'll be okay...I'll be a sad for a bit...but I'll be okay. I don't want to be faithless, but I knew from the start that I needed to be a little realistic in order to deal with doing IVF and the success rates.

God's plan is always good...and we believe He has already planned wonderful things for Jim and I.

Thank you for everything and I will let you know soon....

Hugs and Kisses!!!!

The Waiting Game...

I'm feeling soooo much better! Now it's just the Waiting Game!

We have an appointment this Friday to take a blood test and...well...see if those little eggs planted or not.

I still take a progesterone shot every night, a steroid pill to make sure my body doesn't reject the new eggs, aspirin and all the good prenatal vitamins.

I've been praying for ONLY God's perfect plan...so it's in His hands!

It's taking everything in me to not go out and buy a pregnancy test! The amount of hormones in my body could make a false positive, so that would just be cruel.

Keep praying for us!

Day 3 Bed Rest

These are my little fertilized eggs...the actual ones they put in me...aren't they cute?!

I'm on day 3 of bed rest...ooohhhh how I can't wait to get out and do, well, anything! I really can't complain though, I have been so incredibly taken care of by Jim and my Mom!!! I've also had some wonderful people stop by to visit me and make sure I wasn't too bored.

The actual implantation was pretty cool. Jim and I got to watch as the used a very thin "straw-like" thing to take 2 very tiny fertilized eggs and put them gently into my cervix. The entire procedure took about 20 minutes and then I just rested on my back there for about 30 minutes until we were told it was okay to go home and lay down. The worst part about the entire procedure (which wasn't bad at all) is that you have to have a full bladder...no fun...but no bid deal.

Jim got me home and I've been catered to by him and my Mom ever since.

I think I've watched about 5 movies, read 3 magazines and watched at least ten different TV shows. The bad part about being in bed is that you feel lazy...and when I feel lazy, I tend to want to eat...I feel like this is that "fat shack" where they fatten you up before the wedding. I can't wait to be mobile and get some healthy exercise.

Sooooo....they are in there....it's all up to God's plan!!!!

EGGPLANT DAY!!!

Today:

Tuesday, the Twentieth, Two Thousand Ten, at Two Thirty

This is my Eggplant Day!

We are so excited that this day is finally here!!! Jim and I prayed for God's perfect plan...and we have 100% faith that He is guiding every step of this process.

I made a video last night, just me, and talked to my baby(ies). I wanted him/her to know how much I loved him/her/them already, enough to do all this...and that if this session of IVF does not work...that the baby(ies) I was talking to are still in His plan...and will be here soon!

I'm glad it's been five years of trying! I'm glad this has been a struggle. I'm glad people know we want a child so very bad. I'm glad that when we finally hold our child, it will be a miracle. I'm glad that this child will know every single day of it's life that he/she is loved so very very much.

"Before I formed you in the womb I knew you, before you were born I set you apart; I appointed you as a prophet to the nations."
- Jeremiah 1:5

You forget how much feeling good...feels good...until you feel bad

I had my egg retrieval (aka Harvest Day) last Thursday and it went VERY well!

I had 28 eggs harvested, which the Doc. said is GREAT, and they took Jim's sperm (that was donated that day) and used a "dropper" and created our little ones in a small cup. They estimate that 3-5 days will be needed to get to the right fertilization point.

Of those 28, 17 have fertilized and are splitting and growing rapidly. Of those 17, they will take 2 that look "very good" and implant them into my me. The rest will be frozen for me to use at a later point.

So far it's been a bit of a rough ride, my insides feel like they've been blended then left to ferment into a bloated gas bubble that has overtaken my whole stomach. Nice little visual with your morning cup of coffee :-))))

* This is a picture of me from yesterday...Excited to go on an outing into the real world again...I didn't make it too far...returned to the couch an hour later. *

My IMPLANT DAY is TOMORROW afternoon! We think it's funny that we will be able to know exactly when we conceived... Tuesday, the Twentieth, Two thousand and Ten (that's all T's...funny huh).

I will be on bed-rest from the time I get back tomorrow afternoon until Friday morning. Ugghhh...not looking forward to that...I get very stir-crazy!

Okay, I know I've asked you to pray...but I'm asking you to pray again...pray in agreement that my body will receive the eggs and a pregnancy WILL happen.

"Before I formed you in the womb I knew you, and before you were born, I consecrated you…”
– Jeremiah 1:5

"We prayed for this child and the Lord has granted us what we asked of Him."
- I Samuel 1:27

28 !

That's the number of eggs they retrieved from my ovaries!

The little surgery went great. They prepped me, gave me some happy juice and I woke up with quite a bit of pain. They said harvesting 28 eggs was a lot for my insides to handle, so pain meds have been helpful!

I feel good...kind of like someone mixed my insides up a bit and then kicked me in the stomach on the way out :-)

We will be "on-call" for the next 3-5 days for implantation.

Implantation is the most important part of this process...I will be asking for everyone to PLEASE be on your knees praying for me and for my body to accept these eggs and become pregnant.

Thank you everyone for you emails, texts, call and prayers!!!!

Say a little prayer...

They will be harvesting my eggs tomorrow at 7AM. Please say a little (or big) prayer that everything goes perfect!!!

Jac and Jim

Release the Krakens....(inside joke)

This is me holding the Ovidrel (final realease shot)!

I had my final ultrasound before the IVF procedure today...and my Egg Harvesting will be this Thursday! Doc says my follicles look great and I have a ton! He's thinking they will get between 20-25 eggs. Wooohoooo!

We took the RELEASE shot tonight at 7PM...in 36 hours, my eggs will be ready for a journey into fertilization in a cup.

The retrieval surgery will be at 7AM on Thursday morning. They will put me under local anesthesia and the process to get the eggs out will take about 30 minutes. While they are doing my retreival, Jim will be giving his "sample"...swim hard boys! :-) TMI, I know. They will wake me up...get me settled...and send me home for some R&R.

**I will post a more detailed version of what is going on this week...for those who are reading this and going through IFV or fertility**

A GOOD Negative!!

For the past week, I have not worried as much about a baby...as much as I have worried about myself. I can finally vent my "GOOD negative"!!!

While doing IVF, they make you take a ton of tests...including all the bad stuff you "could have". One test in particular is important for IVF because you could pass it on to your child. This test is for Adult Leukemia...CANCER!

I took this test 3 times! I was told the 3rd time that they STILL couldn't get a negative result and needed me to take an additional DNA test that was more sensitive. I have never been more scared in my entire life! I actually broke down...broke down completely! I called my Mom and she and her friend Kate drove from Vacaville on a moment's notice to come to my house, pray with me, calm me down and basically LIFT me up! Also, Jim and his parents were by my side to just love me and cry with me.

I know this all seems trite with the test being negative now...but for the last week...I was faced with my own life ending (as dramatic as that sounds...that's how I felt). I just wanted to be here and healthy...the fertility issue seemed small in comparison.

Sooooooooooooooooooooo....

I'm okay...I'm okay...I'm okay!!!! God is Good...God is Good...God is Good!

On a side note...my follicles look great, I feel pretty good and I'm ready for egg harvesting on Thursday :-))))))) Yayyyyyy

Sometimes you look around and see things more clear...what's important...what's pure and simple...what's ultimately important in your life!! ...And sometimes, it's just good!

Lookin' Good!

I had my 5th Ultrasound this morning...at the crack of dawn (7AM, and that's crack of dawn for me). Jim came with me to see the progress.

They took my blood, for the hundredth time, and the Dr. did his ultrasound.

My ovaries look fantastic! Dr. Vu says that each one of my ovaries has over 15 good follicles. This means he will be able to harvest over 25 eggs for fertilization. Some women don't have many follicles and the Dr. can't harvest many, so they are left with a minimal amount of frozen embryos if the 1st round of IVF doesn't work. I...am all good though! :-)

He said everything looks good and we are on track for egg retrieval and semen donation....THIS COMING THURSDAY!!!!! Whooooaaaahhhhhh!!!!!! Crazy how fast this is going.

I have another ultrasound on Monday and he said be prepared to feel like you are about 3 months pregnant...I'm going to be swelling and uncomfortable this week.

I say....BRING IT ON...I'm doing this for my baby!!!

(picture is not of me...just an example of what a hyper-stimulated (one) ovary with multiple follicles looks like. Now imagine, you are only supposed to create on of this little sacs each month...and my ovaries are carrying 15+ on each....OUCH).

Ultrasound went great

I had my fourth ultrasound for our IVF session and my follicles (the little sacks holding my eggs) look GREAT! I have over 15 on the right ovary and over 20 on the left. The Dr. says they all look good and are progressing well.

He said I may be feeling good now...but give it a week and I will be cursing his name...oh good!

I was a little tired today and am starting to feel a little "tight" in the belly area...my insides are going to go for a little ride...buckle up!

Thank you to all of you who have called and emailed asking how I'm doing!!! Your simple "how are you doing" means the world to me!!! I'm truly seeing who my "rocks" are.

A Video of what we do every day...AM and PM

Oh well, who cares if the camera adds 10 lbs....this is what we do. It doesn't look bad, but we've perfected it now :-)

Feeling OK today

Yesterday was rough. I won't go into details, but it was just a rough day for me.

Yet, thanks to two Amazing women who sat with me for over two hours to pray for me and hold me up...and a surprise stop from my in-laws who dropped off some gifts for my garden...and a Husband who amazes me every day with his love, kindness and ability to make me feel good.......I'm feeling soooo much better today.

I know this is a journey and I thank God every day for putting amazing people in my life to help me (us) along the way. My cup runneth over!


THANKS: Mom, Kate, Big Jim, Helen and my Jimmy

Just venting

I actually said yesterday to my cousin's wife (who is over 8 months pregnant)
"I don't feel any weird hormonal swings or have any issues right now".

Looks like I forgot to knock on wood!

Last night's shot(s) were a little rough and this morning I woke up with a bit of the blues (and a bruise) and a HUGE desire for Fudruckers! Yes, Fudruckers! Guess where we are having dinner tonight...possibly lunch.

So, it looks like the hormone shots are doing their job...giving me extra hormones. Only three more days of the four shots a day, and then we are back to only two shots...YAYYY!!!

This is what happens when a shot goes wrong...

Starting SHOTS (caps for drama-sake)

I actually took a video of the "first shots" of our IVF....but I refuse to post it. I know the camera adds ten pounds, but really...REALLY!!! I know you are not supposed to lose weight before you get pregnant, but mama needs to tone up a bit (I think I actually saw a double chin...scary). I guess we'll just keep that video for our own amusement :-)

Okay, so most of that was not about fertility, but as I said...we started shots today.

For the next two days:
1 Lupron shot in the AM
1 Lupron shot in the PM

Starting Saturday (4 shots a day):
1 Lupron shot in the AM
1 Gonal F in the AM
1 Lupron shot in the PM
1 Menopur in the PM